Blog with Joel Brookman

Let Go

family ski
I am at my Colorado home where we are beginning our eighth ski season since buying the house. My two girls (ages 13 and 10) have become amazing skiers. My eldest knows the mountain very well, and she has asked to ski alone on past trips. The answer was always “No.” Yesterday, after hours of skiing, the girls want to keep going without my wife and me… just the two of them…alone…no parents. Despite some trepidation, we decide to say yes. It’s time for us to loosen the reigns. They are capable and I have to begin to trust that they will make good decisions. It’s just difficult to let go.

As the end of the year approaches, it’s a good time to look at areas of your life where you can let go. Are you micro-managing anyone at work or at home? Is there someone in your life that deserves more autonomy? Letting go is allowing people to flourish or to fail. Good people will rise to the occasion. By not letting go, not only are you holding them back, you are also keeping more responsibility for yourself. With greater responsibility comes more stress and worry. I see this with small business owners when they refuse to relinquish control and ultimately end up stifling their growth. You can’t be the best at everything and there is a limit to what one person can do in a day.

Most people have an innate need to please others. Feed this desire. Give those around you a chance to prove themselves. If they’ve stumbled before, be sure you communicate the issue and ensure they understand what was done wrong. I’m not suggesting that you give them the “keys to the kingdom” overnight, just incrementally raise their responsibilities and see how they respond. They may just surprise you.

Luckily, I have many more days of skiing ahead and I know my girls will continue to ask for more autonomy. As difficult as it is for me to let go, if they continue to be responsible and make good decisions, I will continue to loosen the reins. 2016 is around the corner, decide where you can loosen the reins in your life.

Posted by Joel Brookman in responsibility, stress, Surrender, worry, year end review and tagged .


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